To take up and make one’s own
Acceptance; To Embrace; To Select or Choose
1 year ago today I adopted my sons. I took them up, embraced them in the depths of my heart and chose them to be accepted and to be my own.
Having been their foster mother first, I had in essence done this years before. The reality was that they were my sons long before a court granted me that gift.
The night before their adoption I wrote this-
I know that in reality nothing changes- I’m your mommy now, I’ll be your mommy tomorrow- and maybe that’s the point… THIS is the promise that nothing changes. Adrian, you will never again feel the sorrow of being taken away from Mommy and Tiger, you will never have to experience that despair. Because from tomorrow on, nothing changes.
1 year ago we were proclaimed a family. 1 year ago Adrian Nathaniel and Tyger John were legally born into existence. 1 year ago I promised to be here forever… forever feels good.
In honor of this incredible blessing that took place 1 year ago, I present to you our adoption day… because I never want to forget the sights, the sounds, the feelings that took place when my family was offically born.
5:30 am wake-up. Jump out of bed not quite feeling like this day is real, that my life is real, that what is going to happen today is real. Shower.
Tyger’s up. Pediasure. Dress him in his oh-so-cute adoption outfit.
Adrian’s up. So excited about his “special day” outfit. Wants to put it on as soon as he wakes up. “Mommy, I wear my special day outfit like Tyger”… yes… everything today is about our “special day”.
Movie in for the boys. Dry hair. Put on makeup… still in a fog, in a “this isn’t for real” fog.
Call mom… bring a snack for Sariyah when you go pick her up from her mother please. Oh and… Eeeeeek!! Happy Adoption Day!
Wake Kiki up… she’s not so excited about the “special day” early wake up call. Dress Kiki. Give her a bottle. Check the diaper bag one more time- colored pencils, paper, stickers, cars, snacks, bottles.
Put earrings in. “You have earrings on for our special day?” Adrian asks.
Take earrings out… they are burning my ears… allergy to something.
7:15– Pick up Molly. We talk about this and that in the stop and go traffic that is Houston. Is this really happening? Is this day for real??
8:00– Drop Molly, Adrian and Kiki off at the courthouse.
8:10– Tyger and I park and walk 2 blocks to the courthouse…
8:20 Bathroom break for Mommy. Adrian wants to sit on the “special day” potty. Finally out of the bathroom after washing everyone’s hands… even if they hadn’t gone potty.
I hear my name called… it’s my lawyer… ready to sign paperwork!
Kiki and I go with him. Molly entertains the boys.
Listening to the questions I will be asked by my lawyer… am I really here? Is this really happening?!?
Pretty much I just have to say my name and then yes, yes, yes, YES!!
Sign some papers.
Back out to the hall with Molly and the boys. They’ve all ready gotten tired of coloring… on to cars.
9:00– the troops arrive- Dad, Mom and Sariyah and Uncle Luke… the excitement is building, the realization of today is starting to set in. And we wait… and wait… and wait… The judge is late… she’s on her way.
It’s HOT… the ceiling to floor windows are beautiful but the sun is blaring down and it is getting uncomfortable and sweaty. Tyger is losing it… he wants Pediasure… and of course it’s in the car. Adrian plays cars with Dada. Dada holds Tyger upside down which makes him giggle and less crabby for a moment.
9:35– the attorney comes out of the courtroom. 3 other families there for adoption… he calls one of the families in for their turn.
9:50– the family emerges from the courtroom crying, hugging, joyful and celebratory.
9:52– We hear our name called and parade in. oh.my.goodness… This is it. This is really happening.
Raise your right hand… swear to tell the truth… so help you God. Introductions. My attorney introduces me, Adrian and Ty and the caseworkers. Judge asks who the others are. Dad jumps in to introduce… I’m dad John, my wife Karen, my children Molly and Luke…
Judge says “I’m sorry you are WHO?” I say “he’s MY dad”. She says “ohhhh, ok. I thought we had a polygomy thing going on here and we were going to have to talk about that!” We laugh.
My attorney starts talking… I give my name… I am floating above everything… This is really happening. My sister is all ready crying. “You have read the files on Adrian and Floyd?” Yes. “And knowing their history and the history of the family and having read their entire file you are asking the court to grant this adoption?” YES… my voice never sounding so definate or sure of anything and the tears start forming in my eyes.
He announces the names… Adrian Nathaniel and Tyger John … “yes”…
I look back at my dad who is holding Tyger and has been kept in the dark about the middle name for months.
He says with a shocked look on his face, “WHAT?!? You didn’t tell me that!!!”.
I smile at him and look back at the judge… John is his name I say. Those standing with us smile, let out a little giggle and a collective “awwww”.
Passing the witness… The boys lawyer is next with questions… She was Adrian’s lawyer during his case and mentions that it has been a long 3 years waiting for this day for me.
She comments that the boys have been placed together for quite awhile and have become brothers… I stammer out a yes and the tears break through… BROTHERS… never a sweeter word heard… my boys are BROTHERS and my heart just soars with emotion.
I look back at Tyger… he’s upside down again… Dada’s doing a great job keeping him happy and from losing it. I’m not doing such a great job with Kiki who was ready to go home about 30 minutes ago and squirming and flailing around in my arms… I think about how beautifully crazy this all is, how beautifully crazy my life is.
And then the judge says… The adoption is granted. The name changes are granted. Congratulations!
Stuffed animals given. Pictures taken. Hugs all around.
Adoption is granted… with those words the boys became my SONS, I became a MOM, and the past 3 years seem all a blur. It really happened…
1 year ago it really, truly happened.
Happy Adoption Anniversary, my sweet, precious, energetic, silly, loving sons!